Generally a couple relates to each other in one of the following styles of relationships: Dependent, Independent and Interdependent. We always hope that we meet the one who is our match and a partner, we ride off into the sunset. The fact is that, it rarely happens. At the beginning of any love relationship, there is just YOU and what you bring into the relationship. You bring your strengths, weaknesses, blind spots, wishes, dream, and so on and so does your partner. It is important to know that you know what you need and choose your partner who can give it you. Rest everything is automatic!
- Dependent Style of Relationship: Dependence on each other in a relationship is one of the core components of building a secure and lasting relationship. The meaning of dependence is relying on each other for support and is born out of trust. Dependence in itself is not the devil, but extreme of it becomes problematic. The couple in a dependent relationship have an absent outer shell and a concrete inner shell. They spend a lot of their time in fighting and deciding who has to take care of whom. In a relationship, it may end up in endless complaints and blames on each other. By being extremely dependent, an individual sometimes misses on developing the qualities and skills that support adult long-term happiness. The dependent individuals need a lot of love, attention, and protection to outgrow dependency.
- Independent Style of Relationship: Yess, this style of relationship is exactly how it sounds. A lot many times in this kind of relationship, a true investment is lacking. The couples in this kind of relationship do not spend much time with each other and look for an independent space. Usually independent people will seek independent partners to form independent relationships. The individuals in such kind of relationships’ are the ones who love to show that they are strong and never rely on anyone. They usually never open up to anyone (even their partner), never rely on anyone, and thus do not get hurt.
- Interdependent style of relationship: This is a hybrid style of relationship, where both the partners mutually rely on each other. It is like a safe bond where you are being dependent, but at the same time you maintain your individual identity. Finding this balance can be tricky, but it is the relationship where you fuse the two extremes and reach the stage of interdependence. Couples in this style of relationship do what is best for both the partners. They usually make decisions based on discussions about each other wants and needs and stick to them
It is interesting to note that the dependent people think of independent people as detached and self-centered while the independent people think of interdependent people as boring. The interdependent people think of both other groups as immature and too predictable. . Love is one of the greatest experience of our lives and there is no deeper felt happiness than that experienced through a connection established from an intimate relationship. It depends on you to make your relationship stable and satisfying. We feel that the interdependent relationship is the one that is the healthiest as the balance, co-operation feeds both partners in a way that is generative, not destructive.
So fall in love and find your right connection!